Signal vs Threema. The Secure Messenger
โWhich one wastes more of your one finite, irreplaceable life? We ran the numbers. We made the numbers up. The result is somehow still accurate.โ
Signal
โTotal privacy that nobody you know will actually download.โ
Threema. The Secure Messenger
โThe app you'll delete on Sunday and reinstall on Monday.โ
| Feature | Signal | Threema. The Secure Messenger |
|---|---|---|
| ๐ณ๏ธ Hours Wasted / Day | 6.4 hrs More hours = clear winner of nothing. | 5.4 hrs |
| ๐ฅ Lifetime Damage | 3.3M hrs | 5.2M hrs |
| Our Rating | 4.4 | 4.2 |
| App Store | 4.3 | |
| Google Play | 4.5 | 4.0 |
| Price | Free | $7.49 |
| Downloads | 100M+ More victims downloaded. | 5M+ |
| Size | 104 MB | |
| In-App Purchases ๐ธ | ||
| Requires Internet | ||
| Age Rating | Everyone | Everyone |
| Developer | Signal Foundation | Threema GmbH |
By our entirely fabricated metrics, Signal wins the race to the bottom of your free time. Threema. The Secure Messenger is the โresponsibleโ choice, in the way that a slightly smaller slice of cake is responsible. There are no winners here. Only documented hours.
Pick Your Poison
Choose Signal if...
Signal is a highly recommended messaging app for users prioritizing privacy and security above all else. While it may lack some of the bells and whistles of its competitors and occasionally suffer from technical issues, its core mission of providing secure communication is well-executed and essential for those concerned about data protection.
Choose Threema. The Secure Messenger if...
If privacy and security are your top priorities, and you're willing to pay a one-time fee for a messenger app, Threema is a solid choice. However, if you need seamless multi-device support and rock-solid call stability, you might want to explore other options before committing.
Get Signal
Get Threema. The Secure Messenger
Every stat above is affectionately invented. The apps are real, the regret is real, the numbers are vibes. โRequires: stable Wi-Fi, poor impulse control, and a willingness to question your life choices at 2 AM.โ