ProtonVPN vs Tor Browser
“Which one wastes more of your one finite, irreplaceable life? We ran the numbers. We made the numbers up. The result is somehow still accurate.”
ProtonVPN
“Five stars from people who meant to stop an hour ago.”
Tor Browser
“Open for a reason. Stay for no reason at all.”
| Feature | ProtonVPN | Tor Browser |
|---|---|---|
| 🕳️ Hours Wasted / Day | 2.4 hrs | 3.7 hrs More hours = clear winner of nothing. |
| 🔥 Lifetime Damage | 370.2M hrs | 49.1M hrs |
| Our Rating | 4.5 | 4.4 |
| App Store | ||
| Google Play | 4.7 | 4.5 |
| Price | Free | Free |
| Downloads | 50M+ More victims downloaded. | 10M+ |
| Size | ||
| In-App Purchases 💸 | ||
| Requires Internet | ||
| Age Rating | Everyone | Everyone |
| Developer | Proton AG | The Tor Project |
By our entirely fabricated metrics, ProtonVPN wins the race to the bottom of your free time. Tor Browser is the “responsible” choice, in the way that a slightly smaller slice of cake is responsible. There are no winners here. Only documented hours.
Pick Your Poison
Choose ProtonVPN if...
ProtonVPN is a solid choice for users seeking a privacy-focused VPN with a generous free option, particularly if you value the Proton ecosystem. However, users heavily reliant on specific countries or who demand rock-solid stability might want to explore alternatives before committing to a long-term paid plan.
Choose Tor Browser if...
Tor Browser is a valuable tool for users prioritizing privacy and security above all else. While it may not be the fastest or most seamless browsing experience, its robust privacy features make it a worthwhile choice for those seeking to protect their online activities. However, users looking for a fast, frictionless browsing experience might find Tor Browser's performance limitations frustrating.
Get ProtonVPN
Get Tor Browser
Every stat above is affectionately invented. The apps are real, the regret is real, the numbers are vibes. “Requires: stable Wi-Fi, poor impulse control, and a willingness to question your life choices at 2 AM.”