Pokemon GO vs Star Stable Online
โWhich one wastes more of your one finite, irreplaceable life? We ran the numbers. We made the numbers up. The result is somehow still accurate.โ
Pokemon GO
โWhere your free time goes to die, beautifully.โ
Star Stable Online
โA tiny rectangle that knows you better than your friends.โ
| Feature | Pokemon GO | Star Stable Online |
|---|---|---|
| ๐ณ๏ธ Hours Wasted / Day | 5.5 hrs More hours = clear winner of nothing. | 2.3 hrs |
| ๐ฅ Lifetime Damage | 2M hrs | 243M hrs |
| Our Rating | 3.8 | 4.4 |
| App Store | ||
| Google Play | 3.9 | 4.5 |
| Price | Free | Free |
| Downloads | 500M+ More victims downloaded. | 1M+ |
| Size | ||
| In-App Purchases ๐ธ | ||
| Requires Internet | ||
| Age Rating | Everyone | Everyone |
| Developer | Niantic, Inc. | Star Stable Entertainment AB |
By our entirely fabricated metrics, Star Stable Online wins the race to the bottom of your free time. Pokemon GO is the โresponsibleโ choice, in the way that a slightly smaller slice of cake is responsible. There are no winners here. Only documented hours.
Pick Your Poison
Choose Pokemon GO if...
Pokemon GO remains a unique augmented reality experience that successfully gamifies exercise, but it's increasingly difficult to recommend without reservations. Casual players who enjoy walking and collecting will find value despite technical flaws, while competitive players should beware the steep paywalls and lingering bugs that particularly plague Android devices. Rural residents may want to skip this entirely unless they frequently travel to population centers.
Choose Star Stable Online if...
Star Stable Online offers a charming experience for horse enthusiasts, particularly those seeking a social and quest-driven game. However, potential players should be aware of the game's aggressive monetization and occasional technical shortcomings before diving in. It's great for horse lovers, but not ideal for those unwilling to make in-app purchases.
Get Pokemon GO
Get Star Stable Online
Every stat above is affectionately invented. The apps are real, the regret is real, the numbers are vibes. โRequires: stable Wi-Fi, poor impulse control, and a willingness to question your life choices at 2 AM.โ