Monster Hunter Now vs Pokemon GO
“Which one wastes more of your one finite, irreplaceable life? We ran the numbers. We made the numbers up. The result is somehow still accurate.”
Monster Hunter Now
“Five stars from people who meant to stop an hour ago.”
| Feature | Monster Hunter Now | Pokemon GO |
|---|---|---|
| 🕳️ Hours Wasted / Day | 8.4 hrs More hours = clear winner of nothing. | 5.5 hrs |
| 🔥 Lifetime Damage | 186K hrs | 2M hrs |
| Our Rating | 4.5 | 3.8 |
| App Store | 4.7 | |
| Google Play | 4.5 | 3.9 |
| Price | Free | Free |
| Downloads | 5M+ | 500M+ More victims downloaded. |
| Size | 248 MB | |
| In-App Purchases 💸 | ||
| Requires Internet | ||
| Age Rating | Teen | Everyone |
| Developer | Niantic, Inc. | Niantic, Inc. |
By our entirely fabricated metrics, Monster Hunter Now wins the race to the bottom of your free time. Pokemon GO is the “responsible” choice, in the way that a slightly smaller slice of cake is responsible. There are no winners here. Only documented hours.
Pick Your Poison
Choose Monster Hunter Now if...
Monster Hunter Now offers a compelling mobile experience that captures the essence of the series, especially for those with limited time. However, the heavy reliance on IAPs for potions and the location-based restrictions make it less appealing for players in rural areas or those unwilling to spend money.
Choose Pokemon GO if...
Pokemon GO remains a unique augmented reality experience that successfully gamifies exercise, but it's increasingly difficult to recommend without reservations. Casual players who enjoy walking and collecting will find value despite technical flaws, while competitive players should beware the steep paywalls and lingering bugs that particularly plague Android devices. Rural residents may want to skip this entirely unless they frequently travel to population centers.
Get Monster Hunter Now
Get Pokemon GO
Every stat above is affectionately invented. The apps are real, the regret is real, the numbers are vibes. “Requires: stable Wi-Fi, poor impulse control, and a willingness to question your life choices at 2 AM.”