LinkedIn vs NGL: ask me anything
“Which one wastes more of your one finite, irreplaceable life? We ran the numbers. We made the numbers up. The result is somehow still accurate.”
“Where former coworkers humblebrag about 'humbling journeys' between motivational cold-open stories.”
NGL: ask me anything
“Anonymous 'questions' that are mostly your own friends being weird at 1 AM.”
| Feature | NGL: ask me anything | |
|---|---|---|
| 🕳️ Hours Wasted / Day | 5.1 hrs More hours = clear winner of nothing. | 4.9 hrs |
| 🔥 Lifetime Damage | 1.3M hrs | 11.5M hrs |
| Our Rating | 3.9 | 4.6 |
| App Store | 4.8 | |
| Google Play | 4.1 | 4.6 |
| Price | Free | Free |
| Downloads | 1B+ | 100M+ More victims downloaded. |
| Size | 142 MB | |
| In-App Purchases 💸 | ||
| Requires Internet | ||
| Age Rating | Everyone | Teen |
| Developer | NGL App |
By our entirely fabricated metrics, NGL: ask me anything wins the race to the bottom of your free time. LinkedIn is the “responsible” choice, in the way that a slightly smaller slice of cake is responsible. There are no winners here. Only documented hours.
Pick Your Poison
Choose LinkedIn if...
LinkedIn remains non-negotiable for serious professionals, job seekers, and students building careers—when it works, it's unmatched for networking and opportunity discovery. However, users should immediately disable non-essential notifications, maintain rigorous account security practices to avoid restriction triggers, and carefully consider whether Premium's steep price justifies the limited additional functionality. Those prioritizing privacy or seeking casual social interaction should look elsewhere.
Choose NGL: ask me anything if...
NGL provides a unique platform for anonymous Q&A, but the value decreases greatly because of the number of possibly fake messages. If you enjoy receiving random, unfiltered thoughts from others and don't mind the potential for fake interactions, NGL is worth a try; otherwise, this might not appeal to you.
Get LinkedIn
Get NGL: ask me anything
Every stat above is affectionately invented. The apps are real, the regret is real, the numbers are vibes. “Requires: stable Wi-Fi, poor impulse control, and a willingness to question your life choices at 2 AM.”