Conversations (Jabber / XMPP) vs Rakuten Viber Messenger
“Which one wastes more of your one finite, irreplaceable life? We ran the numbers. We made the numbers up. The result is somehow still accurate.”
Conversations (Jabber / XMPP)
“Open for a reason. Stay for no reason at all.”
Rakuten Viber Messenger
“The chat app you only open because one relative refuses to use any other one.”
| Feature | Conversations (Jabber / XMPP) | Rakuten Viber Messenger |
|---|---|---|
| 🕳️ Hours Wasted / Day | 9.4 hrs More hours = clear winner of nothing. | 4.5 hrs |
| 🔥 Lifetime Damage | 215K hrs | 4.4M hrs |
| Our Rating | 4.2 | 4.3 |
| App Store | 4.6 | |
| Google Play | 4.1 | 4.1 |
| Price | $3.49 | Free |
| Downloads | 100K+ More victims downloaded. | 1B+ |
| Size | 343 MB | |
| In-App Purchases 💸 | ||
| Requires Internet | ||
| Age Rating | Everyone | Teen |
| Developer | Daniel Gultsch | Viber Media |
By our entirely fabricated metrics, Rakuten Viber Messenger wins the race to the bottom of your free time. Conversations (Jabber / XMPP) is the “responsible” choice, in the way that a slightly smaller slice of cake is responsible. There are no winners here. Only documented hours.
Pick Your Poison
Choose Conversations (Jabber / XMPP) if...
Conversations (Jabber/XMPP) is a solid choice for security-conscious users who value open-source software and the flexibility of the XMPP protocol. If you're comfortable managing your own XMPP server or finding a reliable provider, and don't require OTR, this app is well worth the price. However, be prepared to troubleshoot occasional technical glitches and verify that push notifications function correctly on your device.
Choose Rakuten Viber Messenger if...
Viber remains a solid option if you need a feature-rich messaging app, particularly for international calls and sticker-filled chats. However, be prepared for potential ads and occasional technical hiccups, especially if you rely heavily on the desktop application.
Get Conversations (Jabber / XMPP)
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Every stat above is affectionately invented. The apps are real, the regret is real, the numbers are vibes. “Requires: stable Wi-Fi, poor impulse control, and a willingness to question your life choices at 2 AM.”